COACHING
LEADERS/BEHAVIORAL COACHING
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best when we are doing something because we have to. We only perform well
when we want to. Unity cannot be forced. It must be forged.
Credible leaders are able to build a community of shared vision and val-
ues. To become fully committed, constituents must understand the aims and
aspirations, and they must agree that these aims and aspirations are important
to the success of the organization. The second coaching challenge is to guide
leaders in gaining consensus on shared values and in building trust among
members of the group.
The process of gaining consensus is a highly collaborative process. It
involves listening, patience, and the capacity to resolve conflicts. Sometimes,
these are not easy things for leaders to do. They just want to get on with it. But
we’ve learned over the years that this phase of the process cannot be cut short.
At some level, people will resist when values and visions are imposed or do not
fit with personal beliefs.
The Intensity Challenge
People who feel strongly about the worth of the vision and values will have en-
ergy to act on them. They ’ll have passion and intensity for them. They ’ll set
the example by their own behavior. The third coaching challenge is to make
absolutely certain that leaders are passionate role models for the organization.
When coaching leaders on how they set the example, I look at how they
spend their time and how they handle critical incidents. I listen to their lan-
guage and to the stories that they tell. I examine the measures they use and
how people are rewarded and which individuals get recognized. All these
things send signals to the organization about what the real values are. Credi-
bility is built only when there is alignment between words and deeds.
Passion is the dividing line. Intensity demands enthusiasm, hope, self-
sacrifice, and a never-say-die attitude. The real test of credibility comes when
the times are tough and when leaders have to show the courage of their convic-
tions. As one leader told us, “Adversity does not build character, it reveals it.”
Coaching for intensity is the most demanding phase of the process. It re-
quires a high degree of confidence in one’s skills, a willingness to stand up to
some very strong individuals, and a willingness to walk away from an engage-
ment if the person is not willing to convert words into deeds. It also requires
a unique relationship between coach and leader. The late John Gardner—
leadership scholar and experienced executive in his own right—once com-
mented, “Pity the leader caught between unloving critics and uncritical
lovers.” Sycophants are of no use to leaders. Always hearing that everything
you do is wonderful and right, is a sure route to derailment. Always hearing
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